The Woman in the Purple Dress: What Happened When a Quiet Voice Decided to Become a Diva

The Woman in the Purple Dress: What Happened When a Quiet Voice Decided to Become a Diva

A few weeks ago, our coaching colleague Ulrike Schneeberg invited me to her choir concert in Kreuzberg. I didn’t know what to expect. The Heilig-Kreuz-Kirche was packed. People sat on the floor. Four amateur choirs performed that evening, and they were all remarkably good.

But something happened that I wasn’t prepared for.

Ulrike came to our workshops because she wanted to explore her voice and body language. She’s not shy. But I’d always experienced her as someone with a quieter presence. Not the person who seeks the spotlight.

So when her choir walked on stage and arranged themselves in a half circle, I was not expecting what came next.

Ulrike was radiating. In this purple dress, she was incredibly present in her body, her energy filling the room. I was sitting up on the balcony, and I could actually distinguish her soprano voice from there. Out of an entire choir. I couldn’t believe it. And at the end of the night, when the stage was full of 65 singers, who stood out? Ulrike. Again.

I went up to her afterwards and said: What changed? I didn’t recognize you up there.

She laughed and said: “Well, Esther told me to imagine I was a diva. So I did.”

The Batman Effect

What Ulrike did has a name in psychology. It’s called the Batman Effect: the idea that stepping into an alter ego can help you perform beyond your usual limits.

Ulrike wrote about this experience in her own newsletter, and what she shared is worth reading in full. She described the lead-up to the concert: the dress rehearsal three days before, where her throat constricted, her heartbeat raced, and her limbs trembled. She’d seen Esther’s LinkedIn post about the Batman Effect and decided to try it.

So she created a diva. She watched a documentary about Maria Callas. She chose the outfit: a violet dress, a golden belt, two golden necklaces, shiny black boots. Things Ulrike would never wear in everyday life. She even gave this persona a name (which she’s keeping to herself).

And it worked. Not in a small, subtle way. It worked so powerfully that I, sitting in the balcony among 300 people, could feel it.

Why this matters

I went home that evening thinking about the power of our thoughts. We really do become what we think.

Think about the last time you walked into a room where something was at stake. A presentation. A pitch. An interview. A difficult conversation. What were you thinking in that moment? Were you thinking about everything that could go wrong? Or were you thinking about who you wanted to be in that room?

Because here’s what Ulrike’s story shows: presence isn’t about being naturally loud or naturally confident. It’s a decision. You can choose who you bring into the room.

Try it yourself

Next time you face something that makes you nervous, try creating your own alter ego. Be theatrical about it. That’s what we do in our workshops, and it’s what Ulrike did on that stage.

Ask yourself: Who would be excellent at this? What do they wear? How do they hold their body? How do they use their voice? What energy do they carry into the room?

You don’t have to become someone else. You’re stepping into a version of yourself that already exists but doesn’t always get to come out.

Ulrike proved that on a stage in Kreuzberg, in a purple dress, with 300 people watching.

With joy,

Dyane

Public speaking training, workshops, and coaching for women

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